Thursday, February 09, 2006

Florida

Ok, so spend 5 days in Florida, 1 in West Palm with grandma and 4 in South Beach at a JP Morgan conference.

Of course, when grandma asked, I gave her and her boyfriend my last 2 business cards. Always good to be at a work conference sans business cards.

My grandma's boyfriend, ordered this for breakfast at IHOP - Egg whites microwaved, pancakes with no butter, trade my bacon for two extra pancakes, a pot of hot water, water with a lemon and a straw, and hot syrup microwaved. I can't really figure out the difference between brunch with him and brunch with half the girls I date.

My mom's cousin through marriage, is 88 and has about 1,000 one liners that he says he's putting in a book. They're all something like this: "If 80% of the West Palm Beach population suffer from diarrhea, do the other 20% enjoy it?"

This guy told me all these stories about my grandfather who I'm named after and my grandmothers father who I also never met. Made the 3 hour dinner w/8 people over 80 almost bearable. Esp since I didn't really get any stories out of her this time.

So, grandma and boyfriend live 15 minutes from the train station that they have never been to. So, for a 10:47 train, we leave at 9:33 and I sit for an hour and wait. I purchased a paper and finished it before the train came.

I had a dream that I was in camp again, or maybe it was one of those weird camp reunions that takes place at camp kinda like that movie Indian Summer. Anyway, random people interacting. People I had not seen in 11 years. I looked one up on friendster and asked her if it was weirder that I had the dream, or that I messaged her to tell her about it. Very curious if she writes back.

My flight was $75 each way. My taxi's to and from the airport were around $90 each way.

My cab driver to a club in Miami was totally singing Dido, Here with Me, creepy.

Some Things I Think I learned:

I think I learned that all old people are crazy, in the exact same way 25 year old girls are. I think they act the way they do b/c their mothers acted that way, and thus, it's acceptable.

I think I learned that my grandmother must be an amazing woman, being 90 and dating a 75 year old man who treats her like gold.

I think I learned that someone wrote a book about the 30 or 100 most amazing American women 30 or 50 years ago and my grandmother's got a chapter. How did I not know this? It would have helped me explain the previous thing I learned better than the "she must put out" excuse.

I think I learned that I could never work or go to school in a warm climate. I would never go to work or school or sleep.

I think I learned that my abilities to talk to corporate executives of billion dollar companies with relative ease while hungover and bullshitting.

I think I learned that DVR's are not 100% reliable. I think my first 7 days having DVR were great. Then I went to Florida, The Superbowl went 20 minutes too long, and I got the last 20 min of the game instead of my Grey's recording and thus missed the last 20 minutes of it! And everyone keeps telling me it was an amazing episode.

I think I learned that Superbowl advertisements that are not aired, are much funnier. Check out all the rejected GoDaddy.com advertisements. Very Funny.

I think I learned that my niece is genuinely cute, like seriously:

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