Saturday, June 03, 2006


For me, acting surprised is the hardest thing in the world. I'll get something for my birthday, exactly what I always wanted, and I'll have problems cracking a genuine smile. Maybe things rarely surprise me, maybe I have issues showing surprise, but since everyone's always telling me they have no clue what I'm thinking, here are some things that surprise me

Things That Surprise Me:

Really Stupid Arguments: Not that this needs an explanation, but for example, I was arguing which kind of beach is better, one with fine sand, or one with more granular sand. I mean, are there dumber arguments...obviously the finer sand gets stuck to your body more easily, and is harder to get off, thus is dirtier!

The Hidden Body: I'll go on a few dates with a girl and just assume by her clothing that she's a normal extra 10 lb girl. Then I'll put my hand on her back, or waist, and its like "Damn, you've got a sick body under that baggy clothing!" Def one of my favorite surprises.

Work Analness: Sometimes, I think my bosses decide to complain about things because they are bosses, and thus have power. I really don't understand why they nitpick, or reiterate things they say over and over. I'm totally surprised every time my boss says something that so closely resembles something the writers almost put into the first half of Office Space.

People Who Are Clueless: So many people just don't have a clue. They're space cadets, or they live on daddy's money, or they like talk like this ya know or the worst thing that ever happened to them all week was that they had to wait 7 minutes before they could get a cab and almost missed the previews to the movie. Seriously people, we live in a world here with real things and real people and when I see one of you, I'm shocked you probably grew up in a similar town as me.

The Crazy Dream: I'll be back at summer camp, having a conversation about my kids with some girl I rarely talked to from elementary school. Those totally random dreams just creep up on you sometimes, and if I can remember them, I can't stop smiling about how freaking strange it was. Kinda like "Where the hell did that come from? My brain? I don't think so."

Really Bad Food: I eat good food, and average food all the time. I'm not really used to really bad food, and when I get it, I'm shocked. I don't know what to do. Usually, I continue eating, esp when its lunch food at work, but seriously, how hard is it to make good food? (no seriously, I don't know, I never cook)

Real Problem Solving: I know I wrote 1 line on this last week, but problem solving is quite pleasantly surprising. I'm not talking about games magazine, or riddles (which are fun too), but real life situations. For example, when you're putting up a shelf, and you're in a guy's apartment, and you need to see if its level, obviously they don't have a level, so use a ping pong ball, which they most definitely have, and see if it rolls left or right. That kinda thinking just surprises me about me, about the resoursfulness of the human which most other species don't have. Maybe its a feeling of self fulfillment, that you thought of something totally original on your own, but it feels like a surprise to me!

You're not you: I'll be talking to a girl online, someone I'm set up with through grandma, or a friend or through freindster or whatever, and we'll exchange pictures...and then I go and meet her. She introduces herself and looks nothing like the person in the pictures. It's like "hi where's (insert name)? and can I hang out with her? I hate when people don't look like I'm picturing them.

Next week - Things that don't surprise me, and things that piss me off that people get surprised about.

In Honor of the World Cup Next Week - This Surprised Me

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